And it begins. The greatest story ever told. If your padre told you it was the bible, he was wrong.
Egg Chen shows us the power of the Blue Flame! Buuuuurritos!
or
To get rid of static cling, ancient Chinese secret.
(I try)
The movie goes like this: Some ancient horny Chinese magician gets three runner ups from Iron Chef to kidnap a girl with green eyes because she wouldn't shut up. A clueless white guy and his sidekick, a kung fu master, set out to rescue the obnoxious woman. On the way we get to see guns, martial arts, magic, monsters, and girls. Seems like a foolproof formula for success to me.
I feel good, and I'm not scared at all. I just feel kind of.. kind of invincible. Is it getting hot in here or is it just me?
Jack Burton had some cajones. He was going to take on Thunder (the guy flexing above) armed with just an ornamental balsa wood spear.
Lo Pan. The greatest mofo the world has ever known. Darth who? Lo Pan makes baby Jesus cry.
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